30 years with your mother is not enough.
I remember once, when we were dating, we were driving somewhere together, and I made some snippy and disrespectful comment about “old people” driving because one had inconvenienced me in some way. Later that day your mother gently reminded me that when we talk about the elderly we shouldn’t be mean because “that’s someone’s Nana” (which is what she called her grandmother). She was right of course, and just like that, your mother made me a better person. She has always made me better, she makes everything better. I am still an insensitive jerk far too often, but she has softened me; the thought of disappointing her, or hurting her somehow, makes me sick. Her goodness embarrasses me, and God uses it to nudge me closer to the image of Jesus.
She would always sing to you when you were little and you were upset about something, or couldn’t sleep; you can probably still hear her singing in your heads, “whatever is true, whatever is lovely…” she sang it so often, and it suited her: because she is true, she is lovely.
If you all could somehow step out of your lives and look back on your childhoods from the outside, it would seem amazing. We went through soul-crushing anguish with Megan for years. Your mother had to learn how to be a nurse; she had to learn about all these different medications and had to take care of all of Megan’s wounds after multiple surgeries. I remember a time when we were out of state, I think it was vacation, and Megan’s feeding tube button thing came out of her stomach and we did not have a replacement. We drove hours to a hospital in the middle of the night and this ER doctor was trying to put a new button in, but he was clearly uncomfortable trying to place a device in a hole in a little girls’ stomach, so mom did it, ha. I remember asking the guy “So, what are we paying you for?” She was your sisters’ only nurse every day of her life until I had my aneurysm. All through those years of care and pain your mother kept having other kids, and she would sing to them; she held it all together while I was often working 60-hour weeks to pay the bills. All through that time she was also home schooling you guys (which is crazy when I think about it now) and she was busy in church, always teaching there as well. Did you know that she has a teaching degree?
Even now she continues to be a benediction wherever she goes; she works at the Fox where she is adored and respected, she is a crossing guard every day for little children, including her own, she is constantly taking care of Grammy B and, increasingly, her own parents. Through it all, she continues to be faithful to God. Most mornings, at 7am, you will find her sitting in the living room reading her bible and praying for her children and grandchildren. Your mother is what makes the house on a Gay street a home; when she is not home, home is not home. Wherever I may be, whatever I may be doing on any given day, I would rather be with her.
She has given birth seven times and has suffered through two ugly miscarriages, and she still looks so amazing. We have had more than our share of unhappiness in the last thirty years, but we have never had an unhappy marriage, she is the main reason I tell people that I lead a charmed life.
I do not know what God has planned for her, but her future is wide open, she is capable of anything, and I am committed to helping her do whatever ministry/work/etc. she feels called to do. She will obviously be the best grandmother to every grandchild you all provide, but beyond that, I believe the sky is the limit for her. I know that God loves her, and He will bless her far more than I ever could. I am looking forward to our future because God is awesome, and kind and your mother is amazing.
I am not writing this as a list of reasons why I love your mother, it’s not. I love her because I love her. I just want all of you to know that loving your mother has always been the easiest part of my life. God commands all husbands to love their wives; this is, without a doubt, the easiest command He has ever given me.
I pray that all your marriages will be at least half as good as ours, you will be truly blessed. Always bless your mother; text her, call her, send her gifts and encourage her.
I love you guys.
Dad.
“Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land… she opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and bless her, her husband also, and he praises her: “many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.”
That is how I see your mother. Because that is how God sees Marjorie Lynne Green.